Suicide. That's right. It grabs your eye; however only the word itself. Why is it that
the actions that lead up to it go unnoticed? Please read the following; it's a short story
I wrote on bullying and the twists and turns to them, thank you.
I was born different. When I was in 4th grade, I was bullied by a boy.
I was verbally abused. I was called, 'a waste of space', 'a mistake'.
The problem was that he was my only friend. I was alone...until I met him that is;
he gave me attention and although his way of attention didn't make sense, he
noticed me. I was no longer a face in the crowd, a number on the role sheet, another
mouth to feed, or a failed abortion. I was myself, I was finally my own person. I would
get to school and give him all my lunch when he'd ask for it, I would let him call me names
and push me around the halls. I know what you are thinking- maybe I should have stood up.
But, I got to see a side of him that that he only showed to me- without even knowing it. He
became my bully; I feared him, despite that I saw the vulnerability that lied within his eyes that
cried out for help. He was alone, like me. One day, he stopped bullying me. I became another
face in the crowd again, I no longer mattered- I was invisible. Alone. I had my lunch, my homework,
and no one pushing me around anymore, I hated it. I'd see him now and then, passing down the hallways.
Eyes silently crying for help. Dare not I ask what is wrong. I let it slide hoping he'd be back in a few days.
One day on my way to school, I made slight eye contact with him, he looked at me. Scared. Screaming.
Collapsing. I became visible again. Hurt me. Hurt me the way you always do. Take my lunch! Take it!
Call me a bitch for crying, call me a women for caring; hurt me! Do what you always do best! Make me
feel visible! I'm alone, God damn it! Why wouldn't he say or do anything?! He looked over and mumbled,
"I'm sorry" and walked away. Walk away! Walk away like everyone else I know! I didn't want him to though.
I'll be a nobody again. Let me be someone. The next day, he didn't come to school. Or the next. Later, I found
out he left. If I had only known how to save a life. He has walked away from life that day. Had I possessed the
strength to talk to him when he was hurting. If only I had pushed my selfish desires aside to help him. I knew
something was wrong and I just stood there; watching him slowly die. I craved for so much attention from him
that I cared so little about him. He was my bully, but in reality I was his. I was his bully, the silent invisible bully.
Stood there and did nothing. I was so busy hating myself and the loneliness in which I possessed that I was blinded
to even care about the only person I had. I became my bully's bully. I was his last answer, but I was silent and
invisible. I was an answer, unseen and unheard. I truly am alone.
Please leave a comment and advice on writing or what you loved about it or anything, thank you for your time.